Paimon: So, we finally met Varka. Long time coming, huh? When was the first time we heard his name?
Paimon: Let's see... It definitely wasn't the letter that Ineffa gave us, or when we heard him on the Dodocommunication Device. Was it when Mika read out that letter to the Knights of Favonius? ...No, Paimon's pretty sure Jean mentioned him long before that...
{NICKNAME}: I actually read a book about him in the Mondstadt library once. It was called, "100 Things You Never Knew About Varka."
Paimon: Really? What was it about? A list of all his heroic accomplishments, or something?
{NICKNAME}: That's right, yeah. It was a while ago now, lemme see what I can remember... Ah, yes. There was one bit that said:
{NICKNAME}: "Varka can chug three hundred Dandelion Wines in a row without getting drunk!"
{NICKNAME}: "...Mainly because he drinks them so quickly that the alcohol doesn't have time to kick in."
Paimon: What the hecking heck? Really stretching the definition of heroic there... What else did it say?
{NICKNAME}: "Varka is the only man in the whole of Mondstadt who's ever defeated the city walls in a game of Ludi Harpastum."
Paimon: Huh...
{NICKNAME}: "Varka once won a fight against ten Ruin Guards. Six of them were destroyed by his fishing rod, three of them by the stool he was sitting on..."
{NICKNAME}: "...And the last one thought it had been destroyed, even though it hadn't — but it still counts."
Paimon: Huh... You know, what's weird is that all of this stuff obviously sounds like a bunch of baloney...
Paimon: ...And yet, having actually met Varka in person, it all... kinda makes sense...
Paimon: Wait a second... Do we think that maybe... he wrote this book himself?
Paimon: Next time we're in Mondstadt, our first priority is to head to the library, find Lisa, and borrow that book. Then, we'll take it to Varka and demand answers!
{NICKNAME}: In that case, we'll have to rename it as: 101 Things You Never Knew About Varka.
Paimon: Really? Why? What's the hundred-and-first thing?
{NICKNAME}: "'100 Things You Never Knew About Varka' isn't even a real book. That's the one thing that even Varka never knew about Varka — but of course, the book would never dare break the news to him.