hey
what day is it?

start killing publishers

🎶OHHH S🅰️YY CAN 🎵YOUUU 💥CREAMMM🎇🎵🇺🇸⁉️⁉️ Happy🎊 fWHOREth4️⃣🗓️ of 🍼GOOly you 🤩star-SPANKled 👏🏻SLUTS🫦🫦 and 🫡patriotic PRICKS🇺🇸🎉❕❗️❕ Today🚨 as you👊🏻 get 🗽AbraHOT🥴 for the 👨🏻🍆POUNDING 🧠Fathers🧑‍⚖️🪙 in your lives, 🧎‍♂️‍➡️🧎‍♀️‍➡️BEND OVER🙇🙇‍♀️ and let them ♋️PUMP🍾 their ❤️🤍red and WHITE❤️🤍 stripes 😱DEEP😵 into 🫵🏻your 💙💙blue BOX💙💙❕‼️ Let us 🤬pledge allegiance🫡🎖️ to 🔮🎱COCK AND BALLS🤤🍆🍌🥵 and 🍑ASS AND TITS🍒 as the ORGASMIC 🧨bombs 🅱️URST🌋 in air❗️ I’m 👑proud to be an 🇺🇸🦅AmeriCUNT🤠🇺🇸 this 🎆🎇IndepenDICKS Day🧨‼️🇺🇸‼️ Every 🥴STUPID HOE🙆‍♂️ knows🪟🤨 that WashingTWERK👯‍♀️ DC🏛️ is our 🗽national 🦅capital, but only the 🔥HOTTEST🔥😮‍💨 pieces of 🅰️merican ASS can recite✅ the 5️⃣0️⃣ SLUTS and their capitals‼️ Let’s SCREAM🎆 them together—READY⁉️❔🔢

1️⃣ MontCUMery🫶💦, AlaCLAMa🦪

2️⃣ GOONeau🌀😈🧴, AlaSKEET✊💧😵‍💫

3️⃣ PENIS🍆, AREOLA🍕

4️⃣ Little COCK🤏🏻🤏🏻, ArkanRAW🥩🍣

5️⃣ SCROTUMento🍒, CaliFORNICATE👉🏽👌🏽

6️⃣ DenVERSE↕️, ColoRODo🍡😈

7️⃣ HARDford🤥🍆, ERECTicut🥖

8️⃣ BENDover🧎‍♂️, DelaBAREBACK🏇🏼

9️⃣ PHALLICassee🍌, FloriDONKI-DONK🤤☄️

🔟 FATlanta🐳, GeORGYa👯‍♀️👯‍♂️

1️⃣1️⃣ HonoluLUBED🫗, HaWEENY🌭🤤

1️⃣2️⃣ BUSSY🍑😚, IdaHOE🤪💅

1️⃣3️⃣ SPUNKfield💣💥, IlliLINGUS👅

1️⃣4️⃣ IndiaFAPolis👏🏻🫨, IndiANUS🕳️🤲🏻

1️⃣5️⃣ Des LOINES🩲, IoWANK🤯💦

1️⃣6️⃣ TOEPICKER🦶🏻👌🏿, KansASS♨️🎂

1️⃣7️⃣ FrankFART🍑💨, KenCUCKy🧍‍♂️👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨

1️⃣8️⃣ SCAT ‘N’ SPLOOGE💩💦, LouSQUEEZEiana🫨🍆🫶🏻

1️⃣9️⃣ AuGUSHta🌊, MOANe😮‍💨🥴

2️⃣0️⃣ AnnaHOLEis🕳️, MaryHANDY🤝🏻

2️⃣1️⃣ BUST-on🤯💦🥲, MassaGOOCHetts💢

2️⃣2️⃣ LUSTing💋, BITCHigan😈

2️⃣3️⃣ TAINT Paul💩💨, MEATYsota🥓🤑

2️⃣4️⃣ JACKS-on😊💦🥲, MISS-PISSY-SISSY🍌💦🥃

2️⃣5️⃣ JOHNSON City👺, KISSouri👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

2️⃣6️⃣ HeleNUT🥜, MOUNTana🤠

2️⃣7️⃣ LICK-CUM💦🥵, NebraSKANK🦗🦗

2️⃣8️⃣ cARSEson SHITTY💩, NeVAGa🍯

2️⃣9️⃣ ConcWHOREd🤐, New HUMPSHART🍑💨💩

3️⃣0️⃣ TrenTWAT🤡, New JIZZY🍼🤤

3️⃣1️⃣ Santa GAY🎅🏻💕, NUDE MexiCUM🍆🤌

3️⃣2️⃣ Al-BONER😱🍆, New PORKED🥵🤏🏻

3️⃣3️⃣ RaLIBIDO🫦🫦, North CaroLACTATE🍼

3️⃣4️⃣ PISSmarck🍻, North DaCOOCHIE🥧

3️⃣5️⃣ ColumBOOTY🍰🍰, O-HOG-o🐖

3️⃣6️⃣ CHOKElahoma⛓️‍💥 City, OklaHOMO🏳️‍🌈

3️⃣7️⃣ SLAM-EM🫨🥊, OreGASM🍾🤯

3️⃣8️⃣ HarrisSPURT🌋, PENILEvania🍡

3️⃣9️⃣ PROSTITUTE👙💃, CHODE Island🍠🏝️

4️⃣0️⃣ CoLABIA🥞, SUS🧐 CaroLIGMA🫦

4️⃣1️⃣ QUEER🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️, SUCK DICKota🧠😮‍💨

4️⃣2️⃣ ASSville🍩🍩, TennesSEMEN🦑

4️⃣3️⃣ AuSTUFFED🤰, SEXas🤭🤭

4️⃣4️⃣ SLUT LICK TITTY💄, UTERUS🥢

4️⃣5️⃣ MontPEE-IN-HER🛐, VerMOIST💦

4️⃣6️⃣ DICKmond🌭🌭, VIAGARA💊

4️⃣7️⃣ oNYMPHia💋🤫, WashingTOOT💨

4️⃣8️⃣ CharlesTONGUE👅, West VAGINA🩸🩸

4️⃣9️⃣ DADDY’S SON🧎‍♂️🕺🏻, WisSQUIRTson💦🥽

5️⃣0️⃣ HYMENne🌷😘, WyoMOMMY👵🏻👵🏻

ATTENTION SUBSCRIBERS: WE ARE ANNOUNCING TOTAL BRITISH DEATH! Kill british. Behead british. Roundhouse kick a brit into the concrete. Slam dunk a british baby into the trashcan. Crucify filthy brits. Defecate in a brits fish and chips. Launch british into the sun. Stir fry brits in a wok. Toss british into active volcanoes. Urinate into a british gas tank. Judo throw british into a wood chipper. Twist british heads off. Report british to scotland yard. Karate chop british in half. Curb stomp pregnant scot british. Trap british in quicksand. Crush british in the trash compactor. Liquefy british in a vat of acid. Eat limeys. Dissect british. Exterminate british in the gas chamber. Stomp british skulls with steel toed boots. Cremate british in the oven. Lobotomize british. Mandatory abortions for british. Grind british fetuses in the garbage disposal. Drown british in fried chicken grease. Vaporize british with a ray gun. Kick old british down the stairs. Feed british to alligators. Slice british with a katana.

"hey dude what's happening?"
"Nothing ever happens"
"I'm not talking about geopolitics you fucking moron. I'm asking if we are hanging out later."
"oh, well I'm not doing anything."
"ain't that a surprise."

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee