Parents rejecting my partner due to ethnicity - what should I do?

Hi everyone,

I (Malay) met my partner (British Muslim) online last year in the UK, we’re in our late twenties. We started as friends and later made our intentions for marriage. I’ve met his family - his mom and sisters welcomed me and have been very supportive.

When I told my parents, my dad was calm and told me to “see how things go.” My mom couldn’t accept him because he’s of a different ethnicity. My brother initially supported us but later sided with my mom, when she would get upset when I would bring him up from time to time in conversations, saying I’m blind in love.

Now, my mom and brother refuse to talk about my partner at all, while my dad says I can marry whoever I want once I have a stable job, but for now, he won’t move forward.

My parents have never met or spoken to my partner yet they already formed strong opinions based on stereotypes. Even though my partner has been wanting to meet them since last year. Through this experience, I realised my parents are not very open to mixed marriages however I kept praying that parents will eventually accept him. If I end things, I know I’ll regret it deeply and will resent myself and my parents. But if I go forward, I risk being disowned and causing major heartbreak to the family as I’m the only daughter. I also keep thinking about my parents’ health and age.

I’ve always been obedient to the family, and because I’m being persistent about him - my family are viewing it as being disrespectful and not respecting my parents’ wishes.

Has anyone gone through something similar? How did you handle parental disapproval, especially when culture and ethnicity were the barriers?

Thank you :)

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>Sudah semestinya bagi nasihat

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